At the end of October,  I will be undertaking a new routine.  I will cease my trip along I-24, 440,  and 65 South to Wedgewood avenue,  where I have headed into what has been a five and a half year journey.  I will still be getting up around 6 am to take my daughter to school,  but after I drop her off on the morning of November 2,  I will be embarking on yet another new quest for a slightly different shaped vocation.

I don’t see my vocation or calling as changed at all.  The gaps between  that calling and what my tasks became in my 5 and a half years is an opportunity for me to move my mission closer to reality than it has been ,  or turned out to be,  as I look back and see how I didn’t  get to where I had hoped I would be in five and a half years.

I plan on making my customary stop at Starbuck’s for my morning Pike Place brew,  and as of now,  it seems tome I will be spending a few minutes sitting and connecting via WiFi,  and looking for what I might find by way of a place that would enable me to move closer to my true vocation;  my true calling.  Perhaps I will be called in to do some contract work as I have left behind some tasks that may found to be taxing on those who were accustomed to my doing them.  And perhaps there will be some knowledge or abilities I have that they would want to tap at times.

As I draw closer to that time,  I anticipate that I will have moments of panic.   I hope I can keep my head and heart up sufficiently to keep me going and with it.  I can’t much afford to get into ruts.  I allowed myself too much of that over the past couple of years,  as I experienced long periods of disappointment with not seeing many of my dreams (ones I had for this job when I started it 5 and a half years ago )  fulfilled . Much of that is my doing (or lack thereof).  I failed at communicating the vision I had (have).  I came to feel at times, times that came far too often,  that I was no longer able to effectively articulate it.

So I must take up a discipline of writing the renewal of this vision.  It would help if I had a community to which I was accountable for this.  This has been another major gap/failure for me over the past 3-4 years.  I have not had a lot of time/opportunity I could depend upon to keep me constantly alive in this calling.  I have to seek something to address that.