I spent the better part of the morning writing an email to a friend today, basically reviewing much of the rage I have written in this blog about the betrayals of democracy, the crimes against humanity and truth, and the dangers represented, all by this Bush administration. I guess I felt the need to encapsulate why I seem to have such energy to pound on this for so long.

I feel fatigued from all this, and a bit disillusioned with myself, that I am such a windbag, with very little concrete positive counter-effect work; very little contribution to something better; a true alternative. This is why I am filled with such hope when someone talks about things like a progressive blog network (even though we can’t stop there, but I feel hope that in this, there can be resources for us to take action, to learn of local activity, things we can do.

But still, I long for something more. I need a Church of the Saviour near me that not only provides outlet for some mission I feel I can be good at, but also a community that takes seriously the task of the Church to be a real spirtual home and center; a third place.

To be known, and to follow through on this journey that is born and meant to be shared in community, and discover mission; a calling that is more than just a hope, but an active thing happening that is unmistakably born of the Spirit. That seems so far off, and that feeling makes me tired.